It’s a balance

Picture of familyWhen people have their first child, it is often thought, ‘life is over’. However, I have never looked at it that way. After having my son, I thought ‘life has changed, life is precious and life is just beginning’.

I had a great time when I was single and child free, but life was not rich like it is now. Since having children, life has become so rewarding, fun, precious and fulfilling. Everyday is filled with new challenges, new smiles, lots of hugs, laughter, fun, memories and heart melting moments I never want to forget.

I love being a mum to my 3 gorgeous children and wife to my wonderful husband, but I would like to know where ‘me’ went?

Before children I was a nurse. I was never going to be a seriously career driven nurse, but I enjoyed the work and loved caring for and chatting to patients. I played in a brass band, had lots of friends and enjoyed going out and about. I loved travelling both abroad (Australia, Thailand, Europe, USA, China, just to mention a few) and in the UK. I also loved camping and just going out for meals.

Since having children I am no longer a ‘nurse’, I no longer get to chat to patients or go out to work every day. I have not been abroad since I was pregnant with my son. We tried camping once when my son was 18 months old, I was pregnant with the twins and had morning sickness. It was not a pleasant week, so we returned home and sold the tent! We have not camped since (though we do intend to take the children camping when they are a little bit older).

Now, ‘me’ consists of being a mum, wife, housewife, cook, cleaner, carer, teacher etc…. (the list goes on…). Don’t get me wrong I love it, but I want to find ‘me’ again. Being a mum should not mean you have to give up being ‘you’. I don’t want to go back to my single days, I love life now.

I am currently rediscovering ‘me’.

Now that my son is at school and my twins are going to preschool I have a bit more time on my hands. I don’t want to go back to nursing, it is far too an unsocial job to fit around a family, so I am looking for something else. Since writing this website/blog I have discovered I love writing. I am not technically minded, so web design is not the way to go, but I am thinking about freelance writing. It is not something I have ever considered before, so I am looking into courses to help me along the way. I am quite excited about finding the right course and getting going on it.

Yesterday, I found out that I came 3rd out of 86, for my entry into the special k 30 challenge, with Britmums, how I’ve changed over 30 years, post. I am so happy, I didn’t enter it to win, as I have not entered anything like that before! It has given me such a boost, made me think, ok, so maybe I can write the odd good thing. I can’t wait to start doing something for ‘me’ again! I am also really looking forward to using the spa voucher that I won!

I have also started running! I can’t believe I am doing this, I have never been a sporty person. This Sunday I am running a 2km race (yes I know 2km is not far, but we all have to start somewhere) at Whipsnade Zoo. My goal is just to get round without walking! I am keeping my fingers crossed.

Having children should not mean losing ‘you’. I think many people can feel a bit lost for a while, as you get bogged down in everyday life of nappies, feeding, bathing, refereeing, teaching and housework. However, we all need to make sure we continue with something for ourselves. It is not selfish to think of yourself, it makes for a much happier ‘you’ and in turn, happier, more balanced family life.

I am loving finding ‘me’ again!

I hope this post inspires you to get out and make sure you are thinking about ‘you’.

What things do you do to ensure you are still ‘you’?

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7 Responses to It’s a balance

  1. Great post, and something I am sure many Mum’s feel! My ‘me’ time usually involves some sort of crafting, I need to get back into netball too really as well. Good luck with the run :)

  2. kimmer2111 says:

    Great post!!
    Well done in the Special K 30 challenge & Good luck with the race!

  3. I think you life just takes on a whole new meaning when you have children. Well done for the Special K 30 and all the best with the run. Thank you so much for linking to PoCoLo x

    • karen bell says:

      Completed the run today without stopping in 13 min 26secs. May not seem great but I am pleased as its the best I’ve done :)

  4. blueberetmum says:

    I think I am still me – just a bit changed and improved one :-) I do a lot of walking and sometimes manage to squeeze in a yoga session or two :-) x

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