Category Archives: Twins

I feel the need to become an octopus!

Have you ever felt the need to grow another arm?

Having one child is manageable, as you have 1 hand for the child and 1 hand for all the multi tasking you need to do.

Then having a 2nd child is almost manageable, as you have 1 hand for each child, but can struggle with all the other multi tasking bits.

However, when you throw a 3rd or more into the mix…….you most definitely do not have enough hands!

This theory became most obvious to me the other day, when I collected my son from school……

My twins being only just aged 3, tend to hold 1 of my hands each, while my son (aged 5) unfortunately has to tag along beside us, which I feel guilty about anyway. He is normally happy with this. However, on this occasion (and several subsequent occasions) he wanted to hold my hand. As he never normally does, I thought why not? That’s fair he gets to hold hands too! Oh boy, did all hell break loose!!!!! Neither of my twins would give up my hand. I stood in the playground for what seemed like forever with 3 screaming children (and, everyone looking, I might add!). Eventually, the only way I could get home, without giving in to the twins, was to have my son on 1 hand pulling me forwards, 1 twin on the other hand dragging behind and the 2nd twin in-between, pulling me sideways on my coat!! We walked like this all the way home!! Goodness knows what it looked like to passers-by?! I felt like I was being literally torn in 3 different directions!

I have to say, it is not the first time I have felt split 3 ways. From the moment each child is born you feel more and more divided. It is not that you don’t have enough love to go round, it is more to do with not having enough time and physical body to share round. I really should have been an octopus!! And I only have 3 kids, I have no idea how people manage with more kids.

I love my kids, but I really wish I could grow another arm!!

Please leave me a comment, I love to read your comments……

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Confessions of a mother of twins….mixing up her twins

Picture of identical twin girlsIt can be very difficult to tell identical twins apart.

When I was pregnant with the twins, I was told they were non identical. Great, I thought, at least I won’t have the added problem of telling them apart. Little did I know that 18 months later I would find out, they are in fact identical twins!! To read more about the DNA test I took and my story about this click here.

Now, I have some confessions to make and here they are:

Confession 1

We once got our twins mixed up and fed the same baby twice while the other was starving! – well anyone with twins knows this is very easily done, though this particular instance was a case of mistaken identity rather than just forgetting which baby had already been fed.

Confession 2

I got my babies mixed up at their 6 week check with the doctor! – That was very embarrassing. I told the Dr, “this is C”, he examined her and documented it all. Then I picked up J, looked at her closely and said “ooh, really sorry, actually, this is C!” I felt terrible…..he had to change all the documentation.

Confession 3

We convinced the nursery that C was J and J was C for a day! At nursery drop off we got the twins the wrong way round, but to save embarrassment, we let them think that was correct for the rest of the day.

Confession 4

Many a time have I called out “J”, “J”, “J”, when unable to see their faces, only to find C turn around and say crossly “I am C”! I am not the only one to make this mistake, including BB. But needless to say we always get corrected!

Confession 5

I have been known on occasion, to discipline the wrong twin! When you hear shouting and screaming from another room, you automatically assume it is J, when in fact there are times when it is C. (I know this makes me a very bad mother, but I am only human!)

It is not often I get my twins mixed up, but there are occasions when it does happen, more because I am not concentrating, than because I don’t know who is who. But I thought it was time to confess…….

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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The 3 Birthday Cakes

picture of 3 birthday cakes

3 birthday cakes

Another year has passed. Can’t believe my son is now 5 years old and my twins are now 3 years old, where on earth did that time go?? They had their birthday party at the weekend, they had great fun. I always love watching them have fun at their party. We hired an entertainer this time, which made things so much easier.

If you read my previous post on the twin birthday cake debate, you will know that, we are rather unique in the fact that all 3 of my children share a birthday! (well, that’s not technically true) my twins were born on different days, but my older son and twin 2 shares a birthday! However, I think it would be far too complicated to celebrate twin 1′s birthday one day and then older brother and twin 2′s birthday the next day, so we celebrate all on the same day (after all twin 1 was only born 15 mins before midnight). For this reason, I was debating whether or not to do 1, 2 or 3 birthday cakes. Most children get to have their own birthday cake, so why should twins and an older brother have to share just because they happen to be born at the same time? I decided to make one birthday cake each.

My son wanted a gingerbread house cake! (nice and easy for me then??!!). I had never made a gingerbread house before, let alone put it on a cake, but I was up for the challenge. The twins both said they wanted a heart cake (a little bit easier).

Here are the results of my attempt at 3 birthday cakes:

I think they liked their cakes, my son was staring at his for ages, though, he was probably just dreaming of eating all the sweets on it!

The other thing I liked was the fact that we sang happy birthday 3 times, so they each got their special moment.

This was all a big effort with a lot of hard work, but I am very pleased that I made the extra effort to make each of my childrens birthday individually special. I am just hoping they choose something a little less complicated next year?!

 

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Terrible 2′s (doubled) turn into the stroppy 3′s

IPicture of twin girls playing can’t believe my twins will be 3 this week and my son will be 5. Where has the time gone?

Last year we definitely experienced the terrible twos DOUBLED! A friend once said to me (who had older twins), “when they are 3 it gets a whole lot easier”. I found it hard to believe her, as all I could see were the tantrums, screaming fits, arguing and the need for so much help and entertainment. I thought “how is just a couple of months going to make that much of a difference?” But, I can honestly say, it has! Yes we still get some tantrums etc, but, they are now able to play a lot together and just amuse themselves (definitely a benefit of having twins!). They don’t need as much help physically, they are starting to dress themselves etc. I can now start to reason with them a little (although this still needs a little work). I am loving the turning 3′s!!

Having said all that, they are now however, entering the stroppy 3′s! The terrible 2′s (tantrums), turns into the stroppy 3′s. I think girls are possibly worse on this front, as I don’t remember my son being this stroppy. It is still developing, so I fear I have yet to fully experience the stroppy 3′s in full force. Even if they do get worse, I don’t think (touching wood here) it will be as hard as the terrible 2′s!

So, for anyone with young children or twins, there is light at the end of the tunnel.

Please tell me your experiences.

 

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Bossy twins at play

I find it fascinating watching twins at play. Of course there are the times when they are arguing and fighting, but when they are playing together nicely, it can be so funny and cute. I just wanted to share this video with you of 2 and a half-year old bossy twins playing together.

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Twin birthday cake debate

It’s coming up to that time again, for birthdays.

For those of you who don’t know, the odd thing about my family is that, I have 3 children, 2 of which are twins. 2 of my children share a birthday, but not my twins!! (One twin gets to have her own birthday, While the other twin has to share her birthday with her older brother). Last year the children all had a pirate and princess party together, which was quite difficult incorporating both boys and girls and different ages, but they had a great time.

This year we have started planning for another joint party (I think this may be the last year we will get away with it?). To make things easier we are hiring an entertainer. My son has asked for a gingerbread house cake (not too difficult then??!!) and the twins have both asked for a heart cake. I am still debating whether on not to make the twins one each, as I believe they should all 3 have their own birthday cake, as they are 3 individual little people, but that makes it so difficult.

Picture of twins 2nd birthday cake

The twins 2nd birthday cake

This is the cake I made for my twins last year, which was not too bad as it was just one cake cut in half. I am trying to think of a way I can incorporate 2 heart cakes this time. I will let you know how it all turns out in a few weeks time after their birthday. Do your twins share a birthday cake, or do they have one each?

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2 yr old twins in a supermarket

Thank goodness for the invention of online grocery shopping!

I took my 2-year-old twins to a large supermarket today, let them walk round for the first time (1st time in a large busy supermarket). They wanted to touch everything (as all 2 yr olds do), but what was worse with twins, was that they egged each other on. They were constantly calling their sister saying “look at this” giggling and laughing, then sitting on the floor together inspecting it all! After that, they’d run to the next exciting thing. I have never seen anyone get so excited about supermarket shopping! They weren’t really naughty, just very excited, which I struggled to calm.

Although it was stressful, they did make me smile.

All I can say is though, I am so grateful for online grocery shopping. It has got to be the best thing ever thought of, for mums of multiple children!

 

 

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The ‘bad mum’ feeling!

Last week I learnt, ‘I need eyes in the back of my head!’ I feel like such a bad mum!

Have you ever experienced that terrifying feeling, where your heart feels like it actually stops and then races a million beats a minute as you turn around and your child is not there?! I experienced this last week, it has got to be the worst, most terrifying feeling in the world!!

I was dropping my son off at school and needed to speak to the teacher, so was stood in the playground, at the door, talking to the teacher for about 1 minute. I had hold of C’s hand. Turned around a minute later and………. where is J???, can’t see her!! must be here somewhere!! Why can’t I see her??!! The sheer panic I felt inside was horrendous! I was thinking ‘she must be here, we are in the playground’. I was so confused, frantically scanning the area! Then luckily another mum said to me, “I think she went that way”.(one good thing about having twins, is lots of people recognise us). I picked up C and ran to the other side of the playground and could then see J in the distance, standing on the other side of the car park screaming! I was so relieved, she was ok, I had to fight back my own tears! I was luck this time.

Once all is ok again, the adrenaline starts to calm down and you realise what actually happened, by the time I got to twins club with the girls, I was physically shaking! Then, I start to think ‘I must be such a bad mum’, ‘how could I not have seen her wandering off’, why did I not focus on all 3 children 100% of the time’, ‘why did I not have hold of both the twins hands’????? so many questions, ultimately blaming myself for what had happened.

Looking back at the situation now I have had time to calm down, I still feel horrendously guilty, but, it is just not possible to have eyes in the back of your head. When your focus is momentarily taken away from any 1 of the 3 children, anything can happen. Is it possible to stay 100% focused on all 3 children 100% of the time?? I thought that being in the playground it would be safe to let go of their hands, but I will need to stay more vigilant in future, if I need to talk to the teacher.

Having one child, it is difficult not to take your eyes off them, having a second child is really hard, but having a 3rd in the form of twins, just feels near impossible sometimes!

I know I am not the first person to feel this and I am sure I will not be the last. It is difficult to admit what happened, but I think admitting it and talking about it will help prevent it from happening again in the future.

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Twin potty training again!!

Potty training can be so difficult at the best of times, when you only have one to train, but when you have twins or more, the task seems extremely daunting! I chose to potty train my twins separately as I felt only one of them was ready in the summer. C was trained relatively easily, within just a few days. J on the other hand, although may have been physically ready, was not psychologically ready, so I waited for her.

Over Christmas J suddenly started doing wees on the potty when we asked her to, so I thought maybe she is ready for training. I bought her some nice pants of her own, rather than just expecting her to share her twin sisters. She wanted to wear them straight away, so, I thought, ok why not try now. She has been doing really well, only had one wee accident. But it is getting her to do poos on he potty that I was worried about, then this morning, she did it, all by herself! I was amazed! It just goes to show, you can read your children wrong sometimes. We are not out of the woods yet, but it is a good sign.

With training my twins separately, I was concerned c may regress when j started training, but she hasn’t at all. The only problem I have come across, is that when j gets a treat for going on the potty, c now wants one too, even though she doesn’t need treats any more. At first I tried to resist it, but, actually I think now it just reinforces the potty training, so I have gone with it.

Have you trained your twins together, or separately?

I am keeping my fingers crossed, things continue to go well. I will keep you posted.

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Left and right handedness and identical twins?

I have noticed lately than one of my twins, C, appears to have a definite preference for using her left hand, while my other twin, J, appears to prefer her right hand. As they are identical twins I had not thought they would have different hand preferences, so I have been trying to research this a little.

Here are some basic facts:

  • Less than 10% of the population is left-handed
  • Males are 50% more likely to be left-handed than females
  • Around 20% of all identical twins have 1 which is left-handed and 1 which is right-handed

Many people have tried to argue that handedness is genetic, but due to lots of studies with twins, it has been discovered that handedness is not genetic.

Position in the womb

One theory is that handedness is determined by the positioning in the womb. The ear that faces out of the womb tends to receive the most stimulation and input, therefore stimulates the development to that side of the brain. However, this is not the case for all babies, so this theory has large flaws.

Increased testosterone

Another theory is about prenatal experience and increased levels of testosterone exposure inside the womb.This may decrease the development of the left hemisphere which would in turn explain the increased incidence of left-handedness in males as well as with multiples.

Mirror twins theory

Mirror twins are twins that have developed when the egg splits quite late (around days 9-12). They have genetically identical DNA, but have small mirror image differences, for example, left-handed and right-handed, mirror image dental problems, cowlicks on different sides.

All these theories have their place, but most have been challenged, so we still are not able to explain why people have a preference for left or right-handedness. However, it does explain why identical twins may not have the same hand preference (as it is NOT genetic). I can also tell that my twins are not mirror twins. Their egg must have split very early (in the first 3 days), as they each had their own placenta and sac, also the hair and cowlicks are on the same sides etc.

This should explain why my twins appear to each have a different hand preference.

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